Brunei Anecdotes on Tolerance

During my recent trip to Brunei, I made a heartening observation that mutual-respect and tolerence among races and religions are alive and well in Brunei. It made me feel hopeful and proud as a Bruneian.

It was the first day of Ramadhan - a public holiday - and as usual during that trip, I decided to pop by a nice little cafe where I can access their WiFi internet. The cafe was designed in such as way that much of its facade is opened to the public walkway (to accommodate smokers I presume) while the rest of it was enclosed behind glass and airconditioned.

Many years ago, may be 20 years ago, there was a municiple directive that during daylight hours in the month of Ramadhan all restaurants should be shuttered, bar for a small gap for non-Muslim/non-fasters to get in and out. It raised all kinds of heckles in private, but because this is Brunei, the protests were quiet and not overt. Gradually, the gaps got bigger and bigger, and soon the directive was either quietly shelved or simply ignored.

So it took the Bruneian in me about 2 minutes to realize that - hey - I was having a coffee out in the open in a cafe that is wide open to the public.

Later, I went into a local mall and same thing - the restaurants were widely open and so are the displays (and smell) of food by the aisle.

Open tolerance is (for now) the new norm. And I firmly think this is the way it should be.

Thanks to some clever entrepreneur, for the first time in my whole life, I encountered some "Hari Raya Mooncakes" for sale. It is not often that as with this year that Ramadhan ends on the 8th month in the Chinese calendar meaning the Mid-Autumn Festival falls on the 15th day of Hari Raya. All the better. No reason that only Malay kuih should be served during Hari Raya*. (For the non-Southeast Asian, the Hari Raya marks the end of the Muslim fasting month of Ramadhan, also called Eid-al-Fitri or Eid-Mubarak in some communities.)

Although it must be explained that in Brunei, Chinese food is now considered fairly mainstream for middle class Malays - especially, dim sum. Ever since a few pioneering restaurants began serving halal dim sum perhaps 15 years ago, a dim sum brunch on a Sunday has become a national past time for the Malay middle/professional elite classes.

Another lovely tradition - of open houses during Hari Raya - is still going strong. It is very common for non-Malay Bruneians to have a lot of Malay friends or even relatives. And so, Hari Raya celebrations for many people of all races consists of a moving feast of going from one open-house to another from morning to sometimes late at night. On the appointed days (usually from the 2nd day of Hari Raya onwards and especially on the first and second weekends thereafter) Bruneian Malay-Muslims would invite/welcome friends and colleagues to drop by their homes - present are usually not expected but it is expected for everyone to join in a fairly large hot buffet spread which is now considered de rigueur - which makes hari Raya extremely dangerous for the waistline. For the hosts, its a great honor having their friends visit and would sometimes be "slighted" if someone "skipped" their house.

Even the Cabinet Ministers would open their houses to anyone wanting to visit. The palace is usually opened to the public for 3 days and on their way out, everyone gets to shakehands with the Sultan and other members of the royal family.

My last anecdote about Brunei actually happenned almost 4 years ago, the morning itself of the day just as we were moving to New York. 4 hours before the flight, we got a traffic ticket for making a wrong turn. Pleading with the policeman was no use and we had to deal with the matter at the police HQ. When we got there, we ran into a police officer having a smoke outside the police station. He asked us what happenned and we explained. Without missing a beat, he advised us what to do.... (Now for many people, you might be able to "guess" what was to follow, but that was not it...) He told us, alright, just go in and look for the officer who enters the traffic tickets into the big book and all you have to do is to, " ... say sorry. Just tell him you are sorry and apologize and say you will never do it again." Off we went in and tried what was suggested and presto! he took the ticket from us and with a stern voice "OK, next time don't do that again." and simply tore up the ticket.

On that note, we left for New York thinking what a wonderful place Brunei (still) is.